I think I found the perfect dress for the Christmas party at work, but is it worth it? It's a somewhat retro-looking dress in black with a burgundy pattern. The color is gorgeous.

Of course before I run to Addition-Elle and dish out cash for it, I'll need to check a couple of things -- how expensive is the dress? does it fit me well (I'm small, so I don't want the hem to fall weirdly on my legs)...

On the other hand, I could just use what I have at home and wear my long flowing black skirt (worse comes to worse, buy a new top).


Sometimes I think there's still the fat, nerdy kid stigma attached to me. I've found a lot of high school friends and buddies on Facebook, and it happened with TWO different people that I've posted a message on their wall only to notice that it was deleted, with no reply, no Facebook email, nothing.

For Christ's sake, are they fucking ashamed that I deign writing them in public?!? Geeze, I'm still fat but I'm not contagious. Plus I'm no longer the socially awkward nerd I was 15 years ago. I think anyone who'd read my Facebook page for more than two seconds would notice that... >_<

It's just so fucking rude. Why accept my friend request in the first place if it's to shun me like that? I don't need assholes like that.


It's funny how people assume that you're necessarily self-conscious when you're fat. Recently a lover made that assumption -- granted, he was just trying to reassure me that I didn't need to be self-conscious with him, etc. but I never expressed such self-consciousness in the first place.

Personally, I know what I look like, and I don't look slimmer when I wear clothes... LOL
Actually, I might be accused on the contrary of having too much of an ego. ;)

Guess it's telling though how many girls out there feel self-conscious, whether they're fat or not...